Sex and Tantra
Sadly in our society there is a lot of confusion about tantra. Many people think Tantra = sex. I will dispute this conviction by saying sex is only an aspect of tantra.
Now, as you have been reading a bit about tantra you might have understood that in tantra you might work with intimacy, vulnerability, experience and relating to another person. Of course then you can imagine that the most deep, close, vulnerable and intense interaction you can have with another person is in relating in the bedroom with the person you love most in the world. Also in this intimate realm a lot of our coping/ego mechanisms will become visible, although we often don’t notice. Don’t be surprised if that one person you love the most might trigger and frustrate you the most as well! Therefore sex, and expecially communication within sexuality, and deepening tantric meditations with your beloved are amazing powerful tools where tantric aspects will help you to get to a deeper understanding of yourself and how you relate to another person.
Often I say, your beloved ones (partner and children), are the ones that could be your best teachers.
Often we are trying to please the other, and even find joy in that, or we want to get pleased. A lot of confusion (eg projections) arises when you let somebody that close. Another aspect is that in tantra you practise to see the divine nature of another person, in which you actually will start to see aspects of a the god or goddess in the one in front of you. These aspects are even more deeply and truly seen when you feel in love or when sexual attraction appears.
So Tantra will give you powerful tools to sink more deeply into sex, and to stay in a more true and honest connection with yourself. BUT these tools are not only useful in sex, they are useful in any daily experience you have.
Sex has the quality to be really sensual, which means that your senses become more alert and active. The sense of touch, smell, visual impressions and taste are much more intense and present than when you are sitting behind your computer. A sensual experience is one of the most powerful ways to get deep into the experience of this moment and arrive in the here and now. Hereby sexuality is a great way to practice presence and meditation.
Also it is really good to realise yourself that sex is the origin of all our existence, including all animals. A natural and very basic life force was longing to become more than the sum of its parts. It is wonderful to feel a deep respect and devotion for this sacred source where we are all connected from.
In our sessions we won’t go into sexuality, bút many tools that you get, you can practice at home in a more intimate setting with your partner.
Here you find a beautiful piece written on wikipedia about the representation of tantric union. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yab-Yum